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Stage Fright

from The Indignity Disco by Elsa Hewitt

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lyrics

brought here by something that knew me like i was its only child
the analyst forever undead, rooted in the head says i can trust you
but i dont think i can
stretching you, twisting you, flying you like an elastic band or dry ice
or something that has no shape
he's mellow but more like a pale yellow than a stale hello
then you ask me
'why are you crying and what is wrong with your face'
i said 'i think i swallowed a massive chunk of it'
i think i'm lucky to be human
this experience, emotion, ability
is all mine
why would i waste it
constrain it
restrict it
can i not just explore it and see it?
after all
it doesn't mean a thing in truth
after all
it doesn't mean i thing in truth
you made a man out of me

suffering is easy anyone can do it
it's learning from it
that is the skill
i trailed a boy along a roadside for miles
and when we reached the lake
he drowned me
there's no point but i'm still gasping for air
screaming this is unfair
this is unfair
but this really is
just a wild goose chase
anyone can see that there is love in the midst of this
why else would i be
crying and laughing
there was a moment
sometime last week
when the temperature dropped
and my mind was spotless
the moon was the centre of attention that night
suffering is easy
anyone can do it
it's learning from it
that is the skill
let's face it
the is unpleasant
let's face it
the is unpleasant

you made a man out of me

i never wanna see you with a woman in a dressing gown
but i don't wanna see you shout to a bedroom window in tears
letting you slip away into the mist of another world
into a life apart from mine
but i'll still be beside you in time
letting an eyelid droop till it's closed
watching the sea wash over
a painting we painted together
but i'll take comfort in your freedom from me
boy you made a man out of
you made a man out of

credits

from The Indignity Disco, released August 6, 2010

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